I think my heart is growing.

I know that this whole post may sound crazy.
Like really crazy.
And if you're not an animal person, then it won't make sense.
And if you're not a cat person, then you'll probably be like:
"stop talking about your cat".
Fair enough.
But this is my warning: this entire post consists of me acting like my cat is my child.
Mmmkay?



But if you are an animal person, or a cat person, or a person who just understands
the idea of sharing your house with something so innocent, and little.
Something who relies on you for not only food and shelter, but for comfort and companionship.
Then maybe you'll slightly understand where I'm coming from.

I was never a cat person.
They scared me. So unpredictable with their crazy eyes and their intelligence.

When it was time for us to get our own place,
Sean begged me to say it was okay for his cats from his parent's house to come with us.
And eventually begged for just one to come with us.
And unfortunately had to deal with neither coming with us.

I was just not interested in taking care of an animal.
I'm allergic to them, and while I liked the idea of having a pet to cuddle with,
everything else that comes with having a pet turned me away from them.

Fast forward three years -- to when Sean asked again to get a cat.
And again, I said "no" and I was so sure of myself...
until I saw her in pictures,
and until I held her in my arms,
and until we named her Apollo.



Because once I did that, I fell for her.
And for the idea of having cats as pets.

They're not that scary after all.

Sure, you don't want to put your face too close to her belly,
or dangle things in front of her face,
or move too quickly or in the dark,
but honestly, who would like all those things?
It's not her fault she has cat-like reflexes.
Because... she is a cat.

But for 11 months, I've been loving her.
And taking care of her.
And having conversations with Sean about how I don't remember us not having her.
And it just seems like she's always been in the picture.



And while I fell for her, and the idea of cats as pets, I couldn't imagine getting another cat too.
Because I can't understand how people share their love and attention among more than one animal.
It just didn't make sense to me.

But for the past few weeks, something has changed.
I thought I wouldn't have enough love and attention to give to another cat.
But I've come to realize that's not true.

I think that my heart will just grow.
I won't be taking any love away from Apollo 
to give to a new kitten,
but rather expanding my heart to give the same amount of everything to both.



And I think that must happen when parents become parents for the second time.
Your heart just grows bigger.

And it's looking like our hearts will be growing bigger around 2PM tomorrow afternoon.
I'll let you know how it all turns out...