Marriage Monday: Date Nights.

Sean and I had a date night this past weekend. We went to the jack o' lantern spectacular festival at the Roger Williams Zoo in Providence. It was so much fun and the jack o' lanterns were very impressive. It was also really great to be at the zoo at night... occasionally you could hear the animals but it was a little scary not being able to SEE them.

Basically, the festival included thousands, maybe even hundreds of thousands, of pumpkins that people had carved. They fall into a theme by continent and they also have some carved of famous people. Very cool!

I highly recommend going. It's a fun night. We heard about it through friends and didn't really know what to expect but we've decided to make it a tradition! Next year, we've already agreed that we'll buy hot chocolates to keep our hands warm!

Marriage Monday

I wanted to share the reading from our wedding ceremony. It was something so meaningful and we searched long and hard for words that we felt represented our relationship.

Union by Robert Fulghum

You have known each other from the first glance of acquaintance to this point of commitment. At some point, you decided to marry. From that moment of yes to this moment of yes, indeed, you have been making promises and agreements in an informal way. All those conversations that were held riding in a car or over a meal or during long walks — all those sentences that began with “When we’re married” and continued with “I will” and “you will” and “we will” — those late night talks that included “someday” and “somehow” and “maybe” — and all those promises that are unspoken matters of the heart. All these common things, and more, are the real process of a wedding.

The symbolic vows that you are about to make are a way of saying to one another, “You know all those things we’ve promised and hoped and dreamed — well, I meant it all, every word.”

Look at one another and remember this moment in time. Before this moment you have been many things to one another  — acquaintance, friend, companion, lover, dancing partner, and even teacher, for you have learned much from one another in these last few years. Now you shall say a few words that take you across a threshold of life, and things will never quite be the same between you. For after these vows, you shall say to the world, this is my husband, this is my wife.

It's sweet, right?! 

Marriage Monday!

Wedding pics?!

Before the wedding, I thought long and hard about changing my last name. Ultimately, I decided that I would take Sean's last name but move my last name to become my middle name (since I don't have one). So, even though I'll "keep" my last name I won't actually go by it and plan on just having the "H." on any documents.

But... changing your name is so complicated! I couldn't change it right after the wedding because then my passport wouldn't match my license which wouldn't match my plane tickets for our honeymoon. Huge problem! Everyone told me to wait and just "deal with it later".

The next problem I encountered was that all of our wedding checks were made out to "Mr. & Mrs. Duffy" or "Mrs. Jasmine Duffy"... etc. So, in order to deposit those checks I had to change my name on our bank accounts (I needed proof in the form of our MARRIAGE LICENSE). So, now I've been walking around with a debit card that says Jasmine Duffy without a matching license. Not so smart...

In order to change my license, I have to go to the DMV... but in order to get the DMV to change the name on my license I have to FIRST change my social security card which means a trip to the social security office... which closes every day at 4PM. Not so convenient for people who work. :(

"The Knot" sent me an email saying how "easy" it is to change your name. Now, I don't know if this is a state-to-state thing, but here in Massachusetts... it doesn't appear to be that easy. It's actually pretty frustrating and I can imagine why people might just wait... a while to do anything about it!

I plan on going and making progress tomorrow. I'll let you know if I make it to the office in time before closing. :)

Marriage Monday!

We're trying to plan our first official trip as "husband and wife". You know, because technically on the honeymoon we were NEWLYWEDS. :) Well, I suppose TECHNICALLY we're still newlyweds. But isn't it amazing how quickly people dismiss the fact that you JUST got married? You say you got married 2 months ago and people act like you're a pro! It's crazy.

But back to our potential vacation!

...So, what are we thinking??

The husband suggested:

 Aruba!

 ...in December! Personally, I think that sounds like a perfect way to break up the cold New England winter and I'd love to spend the week before Christmas in a sunny and warm climate. -- I don't think I've ever done that!

So, any suggestions? Have you been to Aruba? Would it be a good place to celebrate our 5 MONTH anniversary?? :)

Marriage Monday!

I mentioned last week that I'm going to start a new weekly post titled: Marriage Monday!

It never occurred to me that it might be mistaken as meaning that Marriage is like a Monday... but then again, I don't really think Mondays are such a bad thing! Personally, I feel revived on Mondays, and enjoy the fact that the week is starting again. It's a sort of new beginning or a fresh start, if you will. And to me, that's exactly what marriage is: a new beginning. A new way of doing things and new way of seeing things. And  it's not only exciting but lucky! Just as lucky as being able to wake up on a Monday morning. :)

The first thing people ask you once you say you've just gotten married -- "how does it feel?". And honestly, it doesn't feel any different. Now, I can understand that if you hadn't lived together before the wedding -- of course, that would be a huge difference! But that wasn't the case for Sean and myself. We've together for almost three years. So in every way... when I say it doesn't feel any different -- it's completely the truth.

That's not to say things haven't changed. For instance here are 5 things I never thought about:

1. The pharmacy takes you much more seriously when you tell them you're picking up a prescription for a "wife" or a "husband" opposed to a "girlfriend/boyfriend/fiance". There are much less questions involved and no awkward stares.

2. Shopping for greeting cards (ex. birthday, holiday, anniversary) is much easier. There's a whole section devoted to husbands and/or wives. They're contained and labeled but a little cheesy. 

3. Shopping for a house/buying a car/opening a bank account. Again, people take you much more seriously when the words husband and/or wife are thrown into the conversation.

4. Signing your names becomes easier, and takes up less space IF you've changed your last name!

5. Explaining to your 4 and 5 year old students who you live with -- is much more comfortable when you're able to answer "my husband".

Of course, these are only a few. But doesn't it make you want to get married like yesterday? :)

PS - referring to said husband as "my husband" makes me laugh a little bit inside every time I hear it. Every.single.time.

A blog addition.

I've decided to devote one day a week to something specific on this here blog. Here's my thought: Marriage Mondays.

Which means, each Monday I'll talk about something related to: marriage!

I thought about doing a wedding related post each week but as a newlywed, I like the idea of talking about marriage instead. I feel like I talked about weddings a lot when I was a bride-to-be and now I'd like to spread my wings.

Of course, I still have so much to share about my actual wedding -- like all those professional pictures that I keep boasting about. So, look out for those on Mondays (I mean, they're completely related to marriage, after all!) but I'll also be talking about what marriage means to me, if things change after "I do", and my new life as a wife. :)

Be sure to check back!